I’m sitting here on a stool in this old, run-down, dead bar called Molly’s. The smell of stale cigarettes lingers on the walls, having soaked in over the years, way before they were banned.
I swirl the brown liquid in my glass, thinking about how I got here, how much I could fuck up, even my own life.
The stool next to me moves, scraping across the floor, but I don’t take my eyes off the glass.
I don’t have to turn around to see who is sitting next to me. I know Fred, the bartender, called him. It’s what he always does when he thinks I’ve gone over the edge.
I think this is my worst bender yet, and trust me, I’ve had a lot of fucking benders. How could I not?
I’ve been here for the past five days, each day coming in at around noon, not leaving till past midnight. A couple of times I even passed out on his dirty, old couch in the office, waking in a puddle of drool with cat hair on my tongue.
Just another phase, they thought. Just another bad time. If only they fucking knew.
“So,” I hear Jackson talk. “How long is it going to last this time?” This is not our first rodeo. Jackson is the only one who has been there for me over the years.
I shrug my shoulders, not even sure of the answer myself.
“Is it Marissa? Is it Lori?” Just the mention of their names is like a stab to the heart. The pain is so unbearable I grab the glass and drink the amber liquid, hoping the burn will overpower the pain.
“Gone,” is all I say, all I can muster up.
“Gone where? Bella just spoke with her,” Jackson says.
“Sandie’s pregnant.” The thought alone makes the liquid I just swallowed down begin to climb back up.
The shocked look on Jackson’s face mimics mine when she told me.
“Had heaven in my hands and I let it go. Fucked it up. Now I’m living in hell.”
With that, I close my eyes, remembering the day I actually touched heaven.
The alarm is blazing somewhere, but my hand can’t seem to find the button to turn off the horrid sound.
Fuck, my head is pounding, my tongue is dry, and my stomach is rumbling. I peer one eye open. I’m never fucking drinking again.
I reach out only to touch a naked leg. What follows next is a moan that I don’t think I’ve heard before.
I raise my head to take in the room. Lavender walls with white trimming greet me. Definitely not my fucking house. The floral duvet is the second sign that I’m not in Kansas anymore. Turning to peer at the naked body next to me, I throw my head back, cursing all the saints above.
I knew going out to shoot pool with the boys wouldn’t end well. The fact that I got my ass handed to me by Thomas was the first sign to go home.
The blonde who came slinking up to me when I tried to sink the eight ball was the second sign.
The blowjob she gave me in the bathroom twenty minutes later was the fucking flashing billboard saying abort mission.
Continuing the party at her house wasn’t a good idea. Fucking her on every single surface was an even worse one.
Getting up, I try not to make a sound to wake her. Searching around the room, I don’t see any of my clothes, but it’s no surprise because she undressed me at the door. Tiptoeing out of the room, my cock lets me know he’s not on board with this plan.
Once I step foot into the living room, it looks like a tornado has passed through it. A bottle of tequila is empty on the floor. Body shots are what she called it. The couch cushions are scattered everywhere.
I find my boxers under a cushion along with a shoe, and then I scan the rest of the room and find my shirt hanging on the lamp in the corner. Snagging it off the lamp roughly as it teeters on the table, I manage to grab it right before it crashes to the floor.
“If you’re looking for your jeans, they are in the kitchen near the fridge.”
I turn to see the blonde leaning against the doorframe, naked in all her glory, her fake tits rimmed with fingertip bruises from the assault I gave them last night.
“Oh, um.” It’s all I can say while I use my shirt to cover my junk. I mean, I know she’s been intimately introduced to him.
“No need to cover up. I got my fill last night. Just close the door on your way out.” Turning to step into the bathroom, she closes the door, effectively dismissing me.
I make my way into the kitchen, snatching up the rest of my clothes before hightailing it out of there.
My car is parked right at the curb, so at least I’m not running around looking for it.
I head home and park in the driveway. Before I can even turn off the ignition, I see a car pull in right behind me. Sandie.
I take a deep breath. This is going to be another episode my neighbors probably don’t want to see.
The car door is ripped open and lo and behold Sandie is there, filling the space with her scent of flowers. I used to love that fucking smell. Now I can’t stand to even look at flowers.
“Did you fuck another woman last night, Mick?”
I stare at her. Her blond hair is perfectly coiffed, and it’s just barely 8 a.m. Her makeup is also tasteful and perfect. Just like she thinks she is, but I know better.
“You are asking me that question when you sleep next to another man, day in and day out.” I push her away from the door, trudging inside my house.
She says nothing to me while she follows me in, slamming the door after her.
“You know I don’t fuck him.” She still follows me while I approach the coffee machine, slipping the Keurig cups into place to wait for the smell of coffee to fill my senses.
“No. What I know is that nine years later, you’re still taking his cock and mine. Sweet deal you got there, babe.” I sneer while I take a sip of the coffee that has just finished brewing.
She walks up to me, rubbing her hands up my shirt, wrapping them around my neck. “You know you’re the only one I love.” She kisses my neck, the sensation making my cock stir to life. Bastard has a mind of its own when it comes to her. “You know I’m just organizing things so I can finally leave him.” Her hand palms my cock that is straining to come out.
“I’ve been listening to your excuses to leave him for the last seven years.” And before I say anything else, she pops the button of my jeans open and drops to her knees.
Taking my cock out, she draws me into her mouth. I have to give it to her. The woman knows how to suck a cock. She’s like a fucking Hoover.